A little catching up...

After weeks of thinking, trying, and searching I have finally found my song.  The song that I like and my kids will grow up hearing every night before they go to bed.  I first heard it on a movie and loved it then.  Why I didn't think of it until just recently, I really don't know.

Close your eyes,
Have no fear,
The monsters gone,
He's on the run and your [mommy's] here, 

Beautiful,
Beautiful, beautiful,
Beautiful Boy,

Before you go to sleep,
Say a little prayer,
Every day in every way,
It's getting better and better,

Beautiful,
Beautiful, beautiful,
Beautiful Boy,

Out on the ocean sailing away,
I can hardly wait,
To see you to come of age,
But I guess we'll both,
Just have to be patient,
Yes it's a long way to go,
But in the meantime,

Before you cross the street,
Take my hand,
Life is just what happens to you,
While your busy making other plans,

Beautiful,
Beautiful, beautiful,
Beautiful Boy,
Darling,
Darling,
Darling [boy]

Just to give credit where credit's due, this is a song written by John Lennon for his son, and what a good one it is. 

Moving on, what the heck is up with all the crazy dreams I've been having lately?! My favorite of dreams took place probably around three weeks ago.  Before I share, let me say I am a person who rarely dreams and who even more rarely remembers dreams. This particular dream is so bizarre and funny that of all dreams, I remember this one.  

I am not in any way a Twilight fanatic of any kind.  I have not read any of the books, have not seen the second movie, only saw the first because it was being shoved down my throat, and do not swoon over "Edward" and/or "Jacob".  My dream, however, would make someone think otherwise. 

I am an employee on the Ellen show (love her!!).  I'm one of the ones with the cool headsets that is actually on the floor behind the cameras during the show, a producer of sorts. On today's show, Robert Pattinson is come.  We proceed with the show like any other taping.  Robert comes out and is talking with Ellen, the interview is going just fine.  In true Ellen fashion, she asks if he's dating....can you see where my dream is going?  Robert looks over at me and with a giddy little grin begins to tell Ellen about him dating one of her employees. Then he comes over, grabs my hand, and takes me on the stage with him.  Pretty much he's head over heels for me and thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread.  We've been "together" for a while but just have kept it hush hush. So it pretty much ends like any chick flick, running off into the sunset kind of thing. Completely random dream?  Uh, yeah. I don't know what to think about it, maybe it's my subconscious screaming out a secret celebrity crush, or maybe it's my overly tired brain finally getting a deep sleep and piecing together experiences (watching the Ellen where he was on) into the most absurd events ever!!  Who knows. 

Mommy-brained, episode 1:

My ears "perk up" and turns my brain on from hibernation mode (or so it seemed), Liam is awake and ready to have his morning bottle.  I look at the clock and "oh crap! I'm gonna be late!"  I jump out of bed, get a bottle warmed up for my little bambino, put him in our bed, and wake up joe to feed him so I can get ready for work.  I go in the bathroom, throw on some clothes for work and throw my hair in a ponytail. I come out of the bathroom and glance at the clock....hmmm....now I'm a little confused. I stared at it for a second, then walked into the kitchen to check the time on the stove....*mouth gapes open and forehead scowls in further confusion*...I walk back into the bedroom and Joe, seeing the confusion on my face asks "what's the matter?"  I stare at the alarm clock again and confess, "It's 3 in the morning.  I don't know what I was thinking or what my eyes were seeing.  Sorry, go back to sleep." Joe's response?  "Are you serious?!"

Oops.

The funny part about that story (it definitely WASN'T funny then), was while I was changing in the bathroom, I thought how cool it was that Liam slept completely through the night for the first time. Boy was I wrong. 

My final thought for the night is what I like to call Ode to Sasha.  I have a friend who is just the darn best thing ever, she is right up there to the coolest thing since sliced bread....definitely. Anyone who knows her will agree that she is so much fun to be around.  If you're having a bad day, Sasha can make you smile.  She says the funniest things, and has dance moves to boot!  One of my all-time FAVORITE Sasha stories is this:  me and Joe were at the B-rau's hanging out one night a couple years back. Sash is sitting on the couch playing with her knee skin. "I want to get my knee pierced" she says out of no where. I died laughing.  I'm not sure why exactly I thought that was so hysterical, but I did.  And it still makes me laugh. Sasha and her boo Alex recently tied the knot, I couldn't be happier for them both. Alex went and joined the army and is currently on the other side of the country in basic training. After only 2 weeks of marriage, he left for his training.  Sash is a trooper.  I don't know how she does it.  She is so supportive of him and seems to be managing alright with him gone.  The fact that she can say "I miss him but..." then continue with her love and support of what Alex is doing I find to be so admirable.  She's not swallowed up in sadness and self-pity because he is gone, she's using this time to get things done for them as a couple and her an individual.  It will be a bitter-sweet day when Alex gets stationed and Sasha moves away to be with him.  Sweet because they will get to start their married adventure together for the long run....bitter because I will miss her, and Alex too.  Alex and Sasha are some of mine and Joe's closest friends.  How sad it will be when they are gone. We love them.  I love you Sash!  You're my girl, my entertainment, my vent buddy, my example of unconditional support, my sista from anotha mista. 

...my favorite things....

Raindrops on roses, whiskers on kittens?  Mmmm....not so much. Roses have nasty thorns, and kittens?  I could personally do without.

My favorite things are far more awesome, although might be flirting with embarrassing, depending who you ask.

The number one, irreplaceable, favorite of all favorites, my boys.

(Seems like it was not that long ago Liam was that small!!)

Alright, I'll be honest, Suka is a little reatrded and can easily be the most annoying thing ever. Nevertheless, he is part of our family.  Suka is our Marley; the world's worst dog who will grow up with Liam and all future Loy babies. My boys = my entire world = pure love = happiness. To sum up my feelings about my family, on June 9, 2006 my life completely changed, on September 27, 2009 my life became complete.

My other favorite things don't mean quite as much as numero uno, but they do make me happy!

It might be corny, the singing might not always sync up with the mouths, but seriously, it has to be one of the most fun, instant good mood shows on!  Do yourself a favor, watch it.

Moving on to one of my newer all-time favorite movies.

If Zac Gayfron ever did a good movie, this is it. Even I must admt, he was awesome in this movie.  I was really hesitant to ever watch this, because it, quite frankly, looked 100% ridiculous.  Ugh....I could not have been more wrong. It's become one of those movies that if it's on tv, it's staying on. Guaranteed!!!

I love that Liam will have such awesome buddies to grow up with.  Liam and Joshua are only 2 1/2 weeks apart. Addison was an April girl but they're still close enough to be good friends! Addison insisted on holding Liam's hand, too cute.  I don't know Josh, you might need to step up your game if you're going to have a shot! Danielle and Michelle are awesome Mamas too, so that makes my part easy to enjoy!

I have sooo much to be happy about these days, and very few things that are worthy enough to get me down. One wish for the night: quit growing so fast Baby Boy!!!

still in the hospital, 9/27/09

First day home 9/28/09

10/2/09  five days old and already looking different

This was not that long ago, he was smiling at Daddy who was giving him a bath.

Same Liam, same swing, but ten weeks time difference. How is that possible?!

It's the best thing ever too see him smile, hear him laugh, and watch him while he explores his surroundings.  I can fully comprehend the "enjoy it while it lasts, they grow up so quick" comments now.

Lesson learned: Cherish every moment, you only get it once.

The Peanut

The little man that has taken over everything in life is almost 6 weeks old.  That's absurd. Where has time gone? It's been a total trip to think back on how small he was the day we came home for the first time as a family of three.  Now all Liam wants to do, other than eat like his dad and sleep, is look around and explore the world around him.  He's wicked strong.  It's so neat to watch him look around and take in all the new sites.

Yesterday after getting home, he woke up and I greeted him with a "hey Peanut!" A big grin followed, which had to have been his way of telling me that was my nickname for him. That, and Chubs because, well, he's plumping up quite nicely! 

He is just a bundle of love and so adorable.  Browning eyes, good complexion, beautiful coloring, and a glorious light brown hair. Looks great in all colors and patterns, and has the sweetest spirit imagineable.

I think it is a little sad how fast he's growing up. We think he's going to be quite the independant little boy, merely because he always wants to be looking out at the world.  Even though I would lvoe for him to stay small for a LONG long time, I'm excited to see how his personality will develop.

Ah, life.

Today was a day filled with many different thoughts and feelings of life in the world.  I was thinking to myself what a wonderful life I have and how much I can't get enough of my little family of three. It's truly amazing to me how much an "oops baby" can change your life.  What started out as a night of upsetting tears and anxiety ended up as a moment of the most pure genuine whole-hearted love looking at me for the first time. 

September 27, 2009 at 4:47 am is when my life, our lives, changed forever.

 How is it possible that so much happiness and love can come from an 8 lb 4 oz 21inch little body?

 How is it possible that a little body that requires so much time and drains every last ounce of energy is the very thing you want to leave everything else behind just to be with?

And how is it possible that even in a stressful, dark, overwhelmed moment, a smile from that little body can melt your heart and bring back the joy and light?

It's amazing.

Then there's the other side to happiness.  I think of those I know who have seemingly endless struggles and trials. Those people who long for happiness, but can never seem to find it. It's so sad to me. It makes me wish I was more able to help these people I care about, so that they might know the happiness I am so lucky to have.

new attempt

not tonight, but I will shortly try to rejoin the blogging world. Now I feel I have more legitimate things to blog about since my little stud Liam joined us almost six weeks ago. As for now, my mind is full and my heart is heavy, as tomorrow I am scheduled to go back to work. I know deep down it is a small sacrifice for our family and will help us reach our long term goals. However, it is so hard to imagine leaving my boy who I am completely head over heels for and haven't been away from for more than 20 minutes since he was born. Today has been so hard for me, and I've tried to manage my emotions as best I can. I am thankful I have family who can watch him while Mom and Dad are working, but no parent wants to leave the care of their most precious treasures to someone else, regardless how trustworthy they may be. I am still keepng a small silent hope that my work will give me the chance to have some work adjustments that will allow me to be with my baby.

Photo Giveaway--Ashley Madsen Photography!

I'm returning to the blogging for my own personal gain rather than updating the few who might be interested enough to look at my blog on the latest of life's happenings. A friend of mine is a photographer doing another giveaway! This is something my little fam WANTS SO BAD!!!! Especially, with the little Loy set to make his appearance in about a month. We would love to have some professional pictures taken by, you guessed it, a professional.

Even though I'd rather win myself, you don't have to know her to enter the giveaway! Follow the link and complete the tasks for your own chance to win, and should you win and want to pass it along to me---I wouldn't mind so much. :)

She has a great website with tons of pictures that she's taken. Go check it out and keep your fingers crossed for me that I get lucky!

http://ashleymadsenphotography.com/blog/

Ashley Madsen Photgraphy Giveaway!!

A friend of mine is an awesome photographer that is doing a giveaway for a photoshoot! I think it would be sweet to get one for the little one on the way. One way to get an entry in the giveaway is to do a blog about it.

Everyone needs to check out her blog. If you already have a blog, follow her directions and you can be entered to win the giveaway too! But if you dont have any use for it, you can give it to me!!! eh hem.... hint hint.

here's the link to her page: http://ashmadsen.blogspot.com/2009/02/drumroll-please.html

Go look!!!